Didn’t get into grad school, feeling like I’ve wasted so much potential and anxious for the future : ADHD

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Last Monday I found out I didn’t get into grad school. I was diagnosed this past September at 23 years old. I know you can all relate to how incredible it is to feel validated through the diagnosis, get on the right meds, finally feel like you’re using more of your potential.

But it’s also been shitty to know that I could have done so much better in undergrad. I came out with a GPA from the past two years of about 3.2/4, with excellent extracurriculars on paper but also feeling like I don’t deserve at least half of the things on my resume cause I can’t stop thinking about how half assed much of it has felt.

I want to work in health policy and just found out that I didn’t get into the only grad school I applied to. I know my GPA is so far from competitive (at least where I live) but was reassured from mentors in my life that my extracurriculars and reference letters made up for it. But here we are, not even put onto a waitlist but flat out rejected.

I’m sad and dejected and don’t know what to do with my life next year or whenever. This might sound like humble bragging but I’m so fucking sick of people telling me I’m smart and that I won’t have any trouble figuring my life out cause I have so much experience because I just don’t think they’re right. I’ve been working part time since graduating and still no luck and I’m tired and I think all these people are wrong. I’m so scared I won’t make it in anywhere cause of my fucking grades even though I’m so passionate about this field.

I just don’t know what to do, and I’m barely motivated to keep applying for jobs/grad schools when all I hear is rejection. Now that I have the ADHD diagnosis and have been working on myself I know i could have done everything in the past better and I just need someone willing to take a chance on me.

Tldr; 8 months after learning/growing after ADHD diagnosis I didn’t get into grad school, I have lots of regrets and am anxious about the future and I need support

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