ignoring online classes bc im riddled with anxiety of passed time : ADHD

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is it even worth it now? i’m so disappointed with myself. my class ends this week and i’ve put it off since after the first week. i also have two other classes to worry about but they arent done yet. i’m so sad i just need to email my professors but i’ve been stuck. i want to cry because i’m suppose to be graduating march 2021. i’m already in my 5th year. i feel so alone because i’m ashamed to tell anyone else since i’ve already reached the last minute scramble that i hoped to avoid. i got on the deans list the last two quarters and my streak is ruined but i atleast need to log onto my school canvas and let my professors know. even if it is last minute. i feel so alone, scared and sad. i feel so stupid because this isn’t the first time i fucked up like this but i was just doing better the last two quarters. i cant even cry. i just want to graduate and make my family proud of me. we are an immigrant family so graduating is so important and i’m the oldest daughter 🙁 anyone have any accountability words for me that i can hopefully get motivated to open my email for the first time in weeks

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