Hello everyone, I was prescribed Adderall XR 15mg once daily by a psychiatrist. It is my first time taking Adderall for an ADHD diagnosis. I am a female, 5’6, 160 pounds.
I have barely taken it for two days and I am scared to take it again. I apologize in advance for the long essay.
The first day I took it was Friday morning at 10:00 am after a hearty breakfast of eggs and bacon. I felt mellow, focused, alert, decreased appetite, and had a fast heartbeat but nothing too alarming. Similar to drinking Redbull and caffeine pills. I was able to focus on my homework and assignments. I also was able to have another meal and some snacks. Towards the end of the night, I found that I just could not sleep. I would lay in bed and panic because my heart was racing so fast…I was worried I would somehow die in my sleep. I ended up going to bed at 3 am. Which was awful because I had to be up at 6 am to get to work (essential worker).
Saturday, I took my second dose at 7:40 am after eating a big breakfast of meat slices, cheese, and breadsticks. I was already feeling tired from running on 3 hours of sleep. At first, I felt fine but I noticed my focus was off at work. I was scatterbrained, kept forgetting what I was supposed to be doing. I forgot my passcode to the register and had to change it twice. I was also sweating and was increasingly annoyed with customers. I ate a heavy snack mid-morning. I also had some slight balance issues. I also had a horrible headache to which I thought was lack of caffeine. I decided to drink a flavored green tea. Just a small backstory, before I was diagnosed with ADHD, I was drinking 2 red bulls a day along with four 200 mg caffeine pills a day to stay alert and focused…
Knowing that I felt like crap at work, I asked to go home, and this was around 11 am. I get home and lay in my bed because I felt so tired but could not sleep. I was wide awake and alert but exhausted. I tossed and turned, nothing helped…so I decided to do some homework. I needed something full of flavor and I grabbed a Zevia can of soda, thinking it was decaffeinated. Sure enough, I look down and it has 35mg of caffeine…I stopped drinking it. I laid in bed around midnight and could not sleep. I monitored my heart rate, and it would change from 88 to 112 resting heart rate. I was using deep breathing exercises to help me relax and it did not help at all. I thought I was going to die because I felt a fluttering in my heart. I looked up symptoms of Adderall use and say that SUDDEN DEATH is a side effect, which made me panic even more. I started having racing thoughts about suddenly dying, when would my roommates find my body, what would death feel like etc…I shook my head and laid back down again to try to sleep….but at this point I would hear noises that were amplified in my head, and when I would open my eyes, I felt tunnel vision. I panicked and ended up driving myself to the ER at 1:30 am…
The nurse at triage said my blood pressure was fine and lectured me about Adderall being like meth and that it induces panic attacks but they would still run an EKG just in case. The ER doctor ran the EKG. He read my results and said I was perfectly healthy, just like he expected, and began to lecture me about Adderall being essentially meth and that my reaction is a standard side effect to a strong stimulant. He said that Adderall XR can last up to 24 hours and advised me to quit taking it and to talk to my psychiatrist. Then I was sent home
I tried to sleep when I got home but to no avail. I tossed and turned When I finally would go to sleep, I would wake-up with a jolt in my heart, similar to when riding a rollercoaster and falling down the drop. It would occur every hour until I got up for work at 6 am. I did not take another dose of Adderall.
At work, I felt weak and tired. I was also irritable. I kept feeling as if my coworkers and management were upset with me and felt anxious. I asked to leave early and they let me. I got home and slept for four hours. I managed to do more work and focus, then went to bed.
Yesterday, Monday, I slept almost all day and was awake a total of 6 hours out of the entire day. I would wake-up to “attend” my online lectures and fall asleep again. My heart rate was just as high as when I was on Adderall…Today, I decided not to take another dose and felt a little better but exhausted and unmotivated. I don’t want to drink coffee because I am trying to wean myself off of it.
What did I do wrong? What do you guys recommend? Should I ask my psychiatrist for Adderall IR 5mg to start with? Should I keep taking the Adderall XR? Am I just an anxious person? I am also afraid of Adderall induced psychosis! I dont want to start hearing voices and analyzing the world around me and people…Do my odds of sudden death increase with each dose of Adderall I take?